Philip Stein: “Write relevant lyrics for ‘Ode An die Freude‘, the E.U.’s anthem”.
Hello world, how are you? We’re the European Union.
We used to be just neighbors but then we had a reunion.
Because every now and again, Europe was a hornet’s nest.
The Spanish Crown, Napoleon, Hitler all tried to fuck the rest.
So then we were like “We should find a way to be buddies,
What about a union instead of all these small countries?”
Now we’re a rich white club, so tell us, can we help you?
Do you maybe need some weapons? We can spare a gun or two.
What? You want to flee your country? No, we can’t take refugees.
No, we don’t have any morals, we had fucking colonies.
Sure, it sucks that you are dying, but we have strict policies.
And to be completely honest, also right-wing sympathies.